Hi, I'm Erika.

Before Jourdan I was solidly numbing and settling in every area of my life. I was in a painful marriage. I also worked at a company that so painfully recreated my childhood trauma and hurts…only it was in the workforce instead of at home! I was parenting the best I could, but it was only slightly better than how I was parented growing up. I was just surviving.

After my 11 year marriage ended, I joined the endless cycles of the anxious and avoidant relationships. I tried to follow various dating coaches “advice” only to later realize that I was perpetuating the cycles due to this “advice” I was receiving. I was terrified to lean into a relationship and when I started to lean in, at the first sign I might be rejected, I would run, put up a wall and protect myself.

I had two little kiddos at home who were watching me, and I was desperate to figure out how to show them a secure relationship when I never saw one. Thankfully, I then found Jourdan and her coaching program! I had always been one to sacrifice my own needs and wants for other people. I never prioritized me, my wants, my needs, etc. Choosing to do one of Jourdan’s programs was probably the first time I chose me and I’m so grateful I did. This has changed everything.

After finding Jourdan I immediately dove into her first program the moment she opened it up! I IMMEDIATELY had so many “aha’ moments and was determined that my past was not going to dictate my future.

I had so much hope when I saw her relationship with Ryan and saw the success from other couples going through her programs. I listened to the trainings, I heard stories from other participants, and I was DETERMINED to make a healthy and secure relationship my reality. I believed that if others could do it, so could I and I fully believed that I had finally found the tools to rewire my brain, heal the years of hurt and trauma, and create a secure thriving 20% type of relationship with a partner.

As I applied what I was learning from Jourdan on the dating scene, I met my now partner, Paul. We have been married since December of 2020 and have moved into couples work and truly have a relationship that is unlike anything either of us have ever seen or experienced. We have four kiddos between us and are loving that we get to show them what a healthy relationship looks like! We are not perfect and we have learned how to repair and grow and are only getting stronger. We protect and prioritize our relationship and have built such a solid relationship together.

I joined the Relationship Theory team because of how passionate I am about this work. When I say this changes everything, I mean it changes EVERYTHING!

As you become more secure and develop a secure relationship, that 100% affects how you show up at work, with family, with friends. Vulnerability and connection are craved, and you are able to securely show up in every situation or repair if needed. You speak up for what you need, you know addressing things head on is the best thing you can do. This doesn’t just show up in the relationship part of your life!

I am so passionate about this work because I know the me before this program….the hurt, lonely, depressed version of me. The one who believed she wasn’t worthy, wasn’t enough (and too much at the same time!), the one who felt like a burden, who felt like she was the exception, the one who felt like she was too independent and that she would have to settle…

I know the me after the program…the me now is a strong, secure woman. One who understands her worth is not determined by other people, who believes she is worthy and completely lovable.

My life has completely done a 180 and not just in my relationships, but in every area.

I joined the team because I am SO determined to help as many couples as possible experience what I (and so many others) have experienced. You. Don’t. Have. To. Settle.

If you’re on the fence, if there is any part of you that resonates with the me before the program, I want to ask you, what do you have to lose? Worst case scenario you don’t learn anything, perpetuate the same anxious/avoidant cycles, and continue experiencing the same old life. Best case scenario - the one that we are ALL passionately working with you towards, the one where hundreds and thousands of people have gone through before you – is that you get to build and experience the thriving secure 20% of relationships with a partner.

When did you start believing that you weren’t worth it? That you don’t deserve a secure and healthy relationship? Who has helped affirm those stories? Why would you continue allowing them to get a say in your future?

Choose you. You are worth it. You are wired for connection.

Hi, I'm Caylin

Before Jourdan, my love life was a string of heartbreaks, constantly giving to only get breadcrumbs in return, leaning in and they pull away, feeling like my worth was only in my body, feeling like I was crazy and that my feelings were “too big,” that I was never enough, and like love was just always going to be this big painful thing.

I felt like I had to “perform” in relationships - putting on a façade that wasn’t really me because the second my partners saw the true me, they hightailed right out of here. And the advice from the scammy online dating coaches telling me to “just send this text” or “play hard to get,” was NOT helping.

I was in a career that most people would dream to have. It was shiny, glamorous, fun, exciting and cool - it was what I thought I always wanted. But I just couldn’t ignore that I felt out of place, like I didn’t belong, and like it was just one more place I was performing for my worth and approval.

On top of that, cue one more soul-crushing heartbreak, and I’m feeling discarded and officially at my lowest.

Little did I know that all it was going to take was some mindless scrolling on social media trying to numb the pain for my world to completely flip upside down - that’s when I found Jourdan.

Hearing her tell me about my anxious attachment style, describing the cycles and patterns I’d been in in my relationships, I fell to my knees and sobbed. I thought, “how is this woman who’s NEVER met me before, describing me to a T?” I had never felt so SEEN before.

Through my tears and feeling some newfound hope, I told myself - “I’m not crazy, I’m going to fix this.”

From that moment on, I was all in and I joined Jourdan’s program.

I learned that 50% of marriages fail, and research has found that 80% of relationships are unhealthy or unhappy, and only 20% are actually secure.

And, I didn’t want to be in the majority anymore - and to do that, I had to rewire my brain and permanently change my attachment style.

I had people tell me I was crazy, that dating intentionally, being upfront about the kind of relationship that I wanted, and wanting to dive into therapy and relationship resources with someone to learn and grow - would push men away.

And it did! With Jourdan’s program, all the people who weren’t looking for the kind of relationship I wanted and who would’ve been repeats of my past patterns - RAN FOR THE HILLS.

And in the process, I was experiencing a level of growth, healing, and confidence I had never had before. And eventually, it all led me to the most amazing gift in my life, my partner Mat.

The relationship that I thought didn’t exist, or that wasn’t meant for me - we built together.
Jourdan gave us the tools, resources and information we both needed to heal our traumas, our patterns and create our dream relationship. Our safe, secure, healthy, deeply vulnerable, perfectly flawed relationship. The “me” now doesn’t have to perform for love or hide the things I thought made me “unlovable, ” and I don’t struggle with those familiar fears, insecure stories and cycles in relationships anymore.

We saw what the power of having the growth mindset can do - no longer thinking “it is what it is” and being the victim to how things were in our past relationships or those we saw around us.

Now I wanted vulnerability in all other aspects of my life, and once I realized I could help others have truly vulnerable lives and secure relationships, I knew that NOTHING would be as fulfilling for me ever again.

When you find the thing completely changes your belief system and how you see the world, you can’t ignore it - and that’s when I joined the Relationship Theory team and it has been the most fulfilling professional experience of my life.

I am a completely different person.

I know it’s cliche when companies say that they’re a “family” - but when you have a community who live life through a belief system built around the importance of secure relationships, vulnerability, growth, compassion and empathy, it changes your life.

So, if you’re on the fence, I’ll say this: change is hard and staying the same is hard.

Which is harder for you?

You get to choose between a life of being alone or in unhealthy or disconnected relationships OR facing your fears and proving your story of being unlovable or not good enough wrong, getting vulnerable and diving into the unfamiliar so you can finally have a secure relationship where you feel safe, seen, heard and loved unconditionally.

Both can be scary. But which is the life you want?

We’ll be here when you’re ready to join us in the 20%.

Hi, I'm Karly

Before Jourdan I was in back-to-back anxious/avoidant cycles in relationships, struggled with boundaries, had such anxiety with performance and work, and really struggled finding ‘safe’ and quality friends. Most everything in my life felt unsafe or inconsistent before meeting Jourdan, and programs helped me uncover the why behind it all.

After finding Jourdan I literally went from living with tremendous anxiety around work, relationships, friendships, etc, to now, falling in love with being a photographer all over again, creating a secure relationship (that I struggled to believe I could ever get), and narrowing my circle down to those who are SO safe. I say it all the time, and it’s the truth - Jourdan's programs changed my entire life.

I joined the Relationship Theory team because I began seeing (for myself) how much my life changed based on getting to the root of my anxiety and fear in all areas of my life. I started taking action on things that I felt I was powerless over - like my job, friendships, and certain relationships. I’m at a point now where it’s hard for me to NOT talk about the impact this has made on me. Being a part of this team means being in a community that is always growing, working on their own shame, and deciding to lean into the discomfort. Being around people that are both growth minded and vulnerable is unfamiliar due to what I’ve been used to, but it’s been the best change I’ve ever had in my life.

If you're on the fence know that I get it. For all of us, it can feel scary to invest time and money into something new. And, you’re the only person that can decide if you're worth it. Jourdan always tells me, “it’s your 4,000 weeks - you get to decide how you choose to spend them.” It’s really really hard to imagine a different life when you’re so stuck in the same patterns, and so that's why building NEW (and healthier) patterns is the way to go. If it's up to me, I'd vote "choose growth, always."